First of all take out the trusty cookbook, How To Cook Everything.  Look up recipe and gather ingredients. Make sure that you only have 2 sq ft of counter space maybe 3 sq ft.

Double up on one key ingredient don’t realize it until you’ve mixed everything.  Looking at the batter say to yourself, “My that looks awfully creamy to be cookie batter!” And, realizing what you’ve done, frantically double up the recipe.

Next make the first 2 dozen too large and fear that they are undercooked in the middle but perfect on the outside.  Then try to burn the last batch.

Bake dang it!  Bake!

Decide that one disaster isn’t enough so repeat above process with a second type of cookie.  Only learning from the first don’t double anything. Still worry about under/over cooking.

Taste test cookies.  Drat!  Not perfect, although it is hard to eff up butter and sugar.  Then give them out to everyone that you can (because you and your belt know that you don’t need 5 dozen cookies all to yourself).  As it turns out you might be a tad overly critical of your own cooking given that the cookies get devoured.  Heave huge sigh of relief.  Plot a day to recreate the insanity.

So, to recap: to make good cookies you need too small a kitchen, too many ingredients, too much or not enough cooking time and to be way too self-critical.  Cheers and enjoy!

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